Sunday, May 4, 2014

More Thoughts on Polyamory

We exist on many levels. These levels are not discrete, of course. But on each level a particular aspect of OurSelves is saliently expressed.
Generally, we live on the Physical, Emotional, Mental and and Soul levels.

I suppose if one is very evolved and integrated those levels are all in almost perfect balance and one will attract a Mate who is likewise balanced on all of those levels such that the two of you resonate perfectly on all of those levels.
The sex will be ATOMIC.
You will intuit one another's feelings effortlessly.
You will be within the same IQ range, standard deviations taken into account, of course.
You will be very similar in your Moral and Spiritual achievements and will spur one another on to develop maximally and your developments will continue to complement and supplement one another's so that you grow ever closer, not further apart.
Under said conditions, I would be Monogamous.

When you get there. Let me know. No bullshitting now.

In the meantime, let's be realistic. We are likely not going to meet anyone who is going to fulfill all of these requirements and if we try to be all of that for another person we are going to live in constant stress of not being able to and becoming a disappointment.
So, what we do is: We settle for someone who fulfills our most urgent needs and sacrifice the rest.

The Age of Sacrifice needs to come to an end.

If one can find someone on any ONE of these levels hold on to that person and keep them in your Life for as long as you can.
Keep each of the people who fulfill you on any ONE of those levels in your Life.

I believe we have Mates on each of those levels.
My Mate on the level of my Body is someone who, get ready now you probably won't believe this, can nary compose a sentence without spelling errors. He's a manual laborer. He's a hick.
I left him because I had to pursue the development of all of my other levels. No one told me to hold on to dear life if you find someone who is perfect for you on *any* of your levels and love and appreciate what that person can give you and find others who are perfect for you on the other levels.

I put someone I loved dearly behind me and went on to "develop my higher orders of being" because no one told me: You can, and should, LOVE *ALL* OF THE PEOPLE WHO GIVE YOU WHAT YOU NEED ON WHATEVER LEVEL THEY GIVE IT. APPRECIATE THEM AND HOLD ON TO THEM FOR DEAR LIFE.

No one told me that's kosher. So, I'm telling you.

Doreen Ellen Bell-Dotan, Tzfat, Israel

DoreenDotan@gmail.com